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Friday was Princess' second day of school, and J-Man's third. I enjoyed the day with Tombliboo, as devastated as I was, and I started to see good things about school. For one thing, I had all my jobs done well before they got home- when 3pm rolled round, I was ready. I enjoyed being with Tombliboo, we went to the beach and played trains, and he helped me bake. The day went surprisingly quickly.
The kids came home bursting with school. J-Man had won a book for being the top student for the week- kind of ironic, since he hadn't been to school for 6 hours a day, 5 days a week for 5.5 years, had done no school work- just played, had fun and lived his life. Then again, dh realised perhaps it was like a bribe, since we had said a decision would be made by Monday. Princess won a book too, and then she was able to choose someone else to win yet another book- naturally she chose, J-Man.
J-Man was very sure he would be going back on Monday, Princess seemed non-comittal though J-Man badgered her about it at every turn. I hoped a couple of days at home would remind them how much fun it was with us. We played a game of Settlers of Catan (which we currently play around 3-4 times a week!). Tombliboo (2.75 yrs) likes to be the banker, though he eventually hordes all the cards, and takes them away to play with his trains. Part way through the game, I was dismayed to hear J-Man announce ,"I can't stand this- my brain isn't being used, and I need to do school work!" He ranted for a bit more, before going to his room to bring out his school maths book. This annoyed me enormously, since he seems to have done just fine with playing games for 10 years, and I said, "If you haven't been using your brain all this time, why are you top of your school class?"
The weekend was fun, and I thought- if school is how it is to be, then I guess we still have weekends, and I can make myself as available as possible for them after 3pm too. Maybe it won't be that bad...but it bugged me to think of our family being like everyone else's- outwardly...there was no way I was happy about losing them each day. I kept thinking about that saying, something like "Being a mother means that your heart forever beats outside your body"...which I hadn't really felt like before, until suddenly 2 of my children, the most important people in the world to me, were gone for 6 hours a day. In truth, and not to sound dramatic- just what I really thought. I felt like I did when I miscarried. An overwhelming sense of emptiness, and I wondered how I would ever really recover. And where did I fit now- not with radical unschoolers, the only place I really ever felt like I fitted...and certainly not with the school mums who were glad of the peace.
A (non-HE) few people told me it must be nice to have a break, but it wasn't. I got the feeling that there would be a whole bunch of people quite pleased this had happened.
After dinner Sunday night, we discussed what would happen in the morning. The kids knew they needed to make a decision about whether or not they would be enrolling in school, and I still hoped that while it looked certain they would- perhaps after a few weeks, or at least when we move to our new house, they would want to come home. Hoping like crazy that this wasn't permanent.
When dh asked, "So- would you like to go to school every day?", Princess immediately answered, "No- I'd rather stay at home." I was all ready to say, "No worries- but you can still be home-schooled again if you change your mind." I had to recover quickly, and ask her to repeat what she had said. She didn't want to go back? Really? 2 days was enough to see that while it was pretty fun, it wasn't preferable to home. Hallelujah!
Then to J-Man, who I realised was the one who was really keen. Princess had just been going along for the ride, and said that the only reason she decided to go was because J-Man wanted her to. And, yes- if he asked her to, she probably would jump off a bridge.
And, blow me down if he didn't say he would rather stay home too. He said, "I like school, but I see it's too much of a sacrifice- I would have have so much less time to be with my family and do the things I want to do if I wasn't home until 3:10pm each day." Oh boy! Is it true? Did my children just realise for themselves how school is inferior to home? With no interference from me, and seemingly a fair bit of encouragement from the school corner...and after only 2/3 days? WHOOPEE!
Suddenly the world seemed normal again...but I was still nervous they might change their minds...but then I was also pretty sure, now that we had been to hell and come out of it so quickly- that there was little chance they would go permanently. They can think for themselves, they can make informed decisions.
J-Man got upset (really upset) with a game he and Princess were playing and I held my breath. That had been the catalyst for his decision to try school. I waited to hear he had changed his mind and he would be tootling off again in the morning. But no, he went to his room for a break, and when I looked in on him, we chatted and his equilibrium was restored. He went back to the game, and I wondered how long I will hold my breath each time they argue over Lego....but then got on with my private (and texting) celebration.
My children would not be going to school in the morning. They would be home with me- and I wouldn't quickly forget what life without them was like. I would make sure to cherish them, and let them know how much I enjoyed their company, and themselves. And Monday rolled around, that's what I did.
The big kids joined us in our itty-bitty double bed for snuggles in the morning, and we all stayed there way longer than usual. It was a very happy day, an ordinary day really- nothing earth-shattering, nothing different at all really- just a normal ol' day, but everything was different for me.
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Choosing School, Part 1 (long!)
So often when people have asked in a panic, "What should I do if my child wants to try school?" I have given advice...but when it happened to me, I didn't follow my own advice as well as I might have.
For one thing, I was so eager to seem supportive (of my child, not of school), that I agreed instantly. I didn't push for further information as to what it was about school that they particularly wanted to try. I have always thought children should choose for themselves, but I was wholly unprepared for it.
For J-Man (aged 10.5 yrs), he wanted friends, he wanted something else to do with his time because our lives have been tipped rather upside-down lately. He was also curious about what went on there, what it was like, would he be good at it? I knew all these things because we have discussed this before, a few times.
Princess (nearly 7) was a different story- for her, it was all about the lunch. Honestly, you wouldn't believe how many directions could be given about the preparation of a school lunch. She was terribly excited.
J-Man's first day had been very interesting. For one thing, I had been unaware how small the local school was. There were 22 children. He was in the senior class with 8 others (and 8 computers). He had even seen a show- a boy much larger than him had been playing with a matchbox car in class, and when a girl told on him the teacher snatched it, and he proceeded to have (in J-Man's words) a "tantrum like a toddler". This escalated out of control apparently, until this child was throwing furniture!
Well, nothing I didn't see myself at school- but still, quite an eye-opener for J-Man. He has been worried about the school maths, but was amazed to find it was "Princess Maths". In other words, very easy. He saw right away that everyone in the class could write better than him, but he also discovered he quite liked writing (well, that didn't last- but he was quite buzzed about it for a day or three).
They had two trampolines which he enjoyed, and when they played sports, he asked if he could stay inside and keep writing his e's (I'm not kidding). Because he was only on a trial, they allowed it. I'm not sure if he would be able to avoid sports forever, but I didn't say so.
The children were friendly, and curious about him. The teacher was kind, and he felt the work was easy (which didn't make him wish it was harder, just be glad he hadn't looked silly). When I picked him up, kids came to ask me if I was J-Man's mum, and told me he was very clever, and a very fast runner to boot.
When Princess started, she was given a worksheet to do which the teacher thought she would need help with- but didn't. In fact she completed it before anyone else, and the other children were all saying, "Wow! She's really smart!" I think that was probably wonderful for her confidence. Where J-Man has never doubted his ability (even when possibly he could have- thinking particularly of when he was small), Princess doubts herself all the time. It seems quite out-of-character considering she is a very confident, sunny, happy little girl. For example, J-Man never doubted he could spell, never asked how to spell anything. Princess, otoh, has asked me how to spell "Happy Birthday" at least a million times. It had to be right with her. She eventually did start writing words for herself, and I was pleased because to me it seemed like a step up confidence-wise.
Anyway, she enjoyed her day very much, and was keen to go back on the Friday.
Meanwhile, I was struggling. I had no friends, no computer, no phone really (though I had some fabulous friends who texted me often), and it felt like my world was falling apart. dh seemed really tickled about school, and slotted straight in to "school Dad mode", trying to get them in to bed early and mediate with the teacher about the problems J-Man had (in what seemed like an attempt to keep him there). When one friend commented I would need to change the name of my blog, I felt crushed. Suddenly I felt like we're the same as everyone else. If the kids are in school, I can hardly be an unschooling mum any longer- and because that was what I had been for so long (and indeed what I imagined I would for a long time to come yet), I suffered a bit from an identity crisis. This was all exacerbated by the fact that I didn't want my children to realise I was devastated- I wanted them to make their own minds up without feeling pulled by wanting to please me. I was supportive of them, and listened well (I think), and when I needed a moment, would go outside and bawl my eyes out as quietly as possible. Only Tombliboo saw, and asked, "What's wrong Mama- why are you sad?"
I was very encouraged by my friend Cally (ex-unschooling Mum- with 4 grown boys), who reminded me that in all her years of this, she had seen many children try school- only those with very strict homes (she calls them section 59 homes, lol), or those children with very clear educational goals stayed longer than 6 weeks or so. I also knew that our life at the moment is utterly different to what it was, and what it will be that I didn't blame them for wanting something different. But there remained a nagging doubt that maybe they would prefer school to home. I couldn't see how that could be possible- what school child would choose school on a Saturday?
There is so much that is wrong with school, and it wasn't at all what I wanted for my children. I wished (briefly) that I could be one of the sugar-is-poison-and-so-is-school/mummy-knows-best mums and insist it was not an option...but I knew that I would no more keep my children home against their will, than I would force them to stay in school.
For one thing, I was so eager to seem supportive (of my child, not of school), that I agreed instantly. I didn't push for further information as to what it was about school that they particularly wanted to try. I have always thought children should choose for themselves, but I was wholly unprepared for it.
For J-Man (aged 10.5 yrs), he wanted friends, he wanted something else to do with his time because our lives have been tipped rather upside-down lately. He was also curious about what went on there, what it was like, would he be good at it? I knew all these things because we have discussed this before, a few times.
Princess (nearly 7) was a different story- for her, it was all about the lunch. Honestly, you wouldn't believe how many directions could be given about the preparation of a school lunch. She was terribly excited.
J-Man's first day had been very interesting. For one thing, I had been unaware how small the local school was. There were 22 children. He was in the senior class with 8 others (and 8 computers). He had even seen a show- a boy much larger than him had been playing with a matchbox car in class, and when a girl told on him the teacher snatched it, and he proceeded to have (in J-Man's words) a "tantrum like a toddler". This escalated out of control apparently, until this child was throwing furniture!
Well, nothing I didn't see myself at school- but still, quite an eye-opener for J-Man. He has been worried about the school maths, but was amazed to find it was "Princess Maths". In other words, very easy. He saw right away that everyone in the class could write better than him, but he also discovered he quite liked writing (well, that didn't last- but he was quite buzzed about it for a day or three).
They had two trampolines which he enjoyed, and when they played sports, he asked if he could stay inside and keep writing his e's (I'm not kidding). Because he was only on a trial, they allowed it. I'm not sure if he would be able to avoid sports forever, but I didn't say so.
The children were friendly, and curious about him. The teacher was kind, and he felt the work was easy (which didn't make him wish it was harder, just be glad he hadn't looked silly). When I picked him up, kids came to ask me if I was J-Man's mum, and told me he was very clever, and a very fast runner to boot.
When Princess started, she was given a worksheet to do which the teacher thought she would need help with- but didn't. In fact she completed it before anyone else, and the other children were all saying, "Wow! She's really smart!" I think that was probably wonderful for her confidence. Where J-Man has never doubted his ability (even when possibly he could have- thinking particularly of when he was small), Princess doubts herself all the time. It seems quite out-of-character considering she is a very confident, sunny, happy little girl. For example, J-Man never doubted he could spell, never asked how to spell anything. Princess, otoh, has asked me how to spell "Happy Birthday" at least a million times. It had to be right with her. She eventually did start writing words for herself, and I was pleased because to me it seemed like a step up confidence-wise.
Anyway, she enjoyed her day very much, and was keen to go back on the Friday.
Meanwhile, I was struggling. I had no friends, no computer, no phone really (though I had some fabulous friends who texted me often), and it felt like my world was falling apart. dh seemed really tickled about school, and slotted straight in to "school Dad mode", trying to get them in to bed early and mediate with the teacher about the problems J-Man had (in what seemed like an attempt to keep him there). When one friend commented I would need to change the name of my blog, I felt crushed. Suddenly I felt like we're the same as everyone else. If the kids are in school, I can hardly be an unschooling mum any longer- and because that was what I had been for so long (and indeed what I imagined I would for a long time to come yet), I suffered a bit from an identity crisis. This was all exacerbated by the fact that I didn't want my children to realise I was devastated- I wanted them to make their own minds up without feeling pulled by wanting to please me. I was supportive of them, and listened well (I think), and when I needed a moment, would go outside and bawl my eyes out as quietly as possible. Only Tombliboo saw, and asked, "What's wrong Mama- why are you sad?"
I was very encouraged by my friend Cally (ex-unschooling Mum- with 4 grown boys), who reminded me that in all her years of this, she had seen many children try school- only those with very strict homes (she calls them section 59 homes, lol), or those children with very clear educational goals stayed longer than 6 weeks or so. I also knew that our life at the moment is utterly different to what it was, and what it will be that I didn't blame them for wanting something different. But there remained a nagging doubt that maybe they would prefer school to home. I couldn't see how that could be possible- what school child would choose school on a Saturday?
There is so much that is wrong with school, and it wasn't at all what I wanted for my children. I wished (briefly) that I could be one of the sugar-is-poison-and-so-is-school/mummy-knows-best mums and insist it was not an option...but I knew that I would no more keep my children home against their will, than I would force them to stay in school.
Thursday, August 20, 2009
I'm Back!
Well, sort of- we only have dial-up and while the whole world knwos it's slow, I think most people don't rememeber just *how* slow!
I will try to keep things brief here, and elucidate as time (and internet connection) allows.
We are still living in the little bach on the beach. It's quite lovely really, but annoying to be so far from town and people in general. Teh hosue is still at least 2 months from completion.
Ben is unemployed, but working on the hosue as often as possible to try and get us there a bit quicker. I have done 3 days work in 3 weeks, which is not much, but has helped just to get a few extra bits and pieces to make our lives a little more interesting.
Tomorrow we are heading to Whangarei for a home education symposium. I can't wait. J-Man thinks it is silly sicne we've been homeschooling for 5 years, so what do I need to hear about it. But I am excited about meeting more people, especially Kerrin from our kiwi unschooler's group, who's posts I have enjoyed for over 5 years, but never met personally.
I also hope I might be a help to somebody there- funny to imagine people with children just 5, or not even. The last conference I went to- that was me. Wondering how I would go about homeschooling with a toddler as well. It's funny to think of really. I worried about so many things quite unnecessarily.
Ben will look after the kiddos, and hopefully meet up with some friends of our's that live there.
It has been quite lonely here, but I was managing alright because I liked being with the kiddos. Also, with such a small hosue the cleaning is done fairly quickly, and I have been able to play(and be) with them so much more than when we were in Auckland. I also wasn't busy on the computer, which freed up my time- but at a cost. No friends at all is pretty draining. Well, I shouldn't say that- I've had some awesome friends texting me very regularly, and cheering me up no end.
Anyway, I was coping as I said- but it all went to pot a few weeks ago when J-Man decided he wanted to go to school. I'll talk about all the whys and wherefores in another post, but suffice it for now to say- he went! And then he convinced Princess to go too.
And now they're home. And everything seems right with the world once again.
I will try to keep things brief here, and elucidate as time (and internet connection) allows.
We are still living in the little bach on the beach. It's quite lovely really, but annoying to be so far from town and people in general. Teh hosue is still at least 2 months from completion.
Ben is unemployed, but working on the hosue as often as possible to try and get us there a bit quicker. I have done 3 days work in 3 weeks, which is not much, but has helped just to get a few extra bits and pieces to make our lives a little more interesting.
Tomorrow we are heading to Whangarei for a home education symposium. I can't wait. J-Man thinks it is silly sicne we've been homeschooling for 5 years, so what do I need to hear about it. But I am excited about meeting more people, especially Kerrin from our kiwi unschooler's group, who's posts I have enjoyed for over 5 years, but never met personally.
I also hope I might be a help to somebody there- funny to imagine people with children just 5, or not even. The last conference I went to- that was me. Wondering how I would go about homeschooling with a toddler as well. It's funny to think of really. I worried about so many things quite unnecessarily.
Ben will look after the kiddos, and hopefully meet up with some friends of our's that live there.
It has been quite lonely here, but I was managing alright because I liked being with the kiddos. Also, with such a small hosue the cleaning is done fairly quickly, and I have been able to play(and be) with them so much more than when we were in Auckland. I also wasn't busy on the computer, which freed up my time- but at a cost. No friends at all is pretty draining. Well, I shouldn't say that- I've had some awesome friends texting me very regularly, and cheering me up no end.
Anyway, I was coping as I said- but it all went to pot a few weeks ago when J-Man decided he wanted to go to school. I'll talk about all the whys and wherefores in another post, but suffice it for now to say- he went! And then he convinced Princess to go too.
And now they're home. And everything seems right with the world once again.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Quick Update
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Hi Folks :0)
No time at all, and my first time on a computer in 3 weeks.
We have made it to Keriekri (nearly 3 weeks ago). We were happy at the bach, but Tombibloo in particular really couldn;t understand why he couldn't see his Daddy. So, we are renting a place up here until our house is finished (at least 2 months away).
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The place we are in is very cute, very small- but plenty big enough for us atm...also, not much to clean- Whoopee!
It is on a lovely private beach, and we are very spoiled...we eat breakfast whislt watching the tide come in, herons prnacing about, and all manner of birdlife to boot.
The kids are happy...we all are. In a way, life is in limbo- Ben has work atm, but only for 3 weeks, and we are unsure of how many hours each day he will get until the day arrives. He takes the car each day, so we aren't really making friends yet.
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Still, happy, really happily, J-Man and Princess are getting on better than ever- playing ponies for several hours each day.
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We are unplugged in a sense- we still have dvd's , but no tv or comp0uter...and it really is great :0)
Not that I wouldn't mind a computer her eand there- but really, I love spending extra time with the kiddos.
We've learned to play a board gmae we were given 3 years ago and haven;t opened (!), and have taught the kids to play Up and Down the River (To hell and back), 500 and solitaire.
Time is up, unfortunately...but I will try to get on again soon :0)
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Unschooled Timestables
The other day J-Man (10) and I were discussing timestables for no particular reason (honestly- why were we discussing them??).
I commented that most kids his age in school would know their timestables by now, but that it wasn't a worry for me because he was able to work them out, and if he ever decided they would be useful to know quickly- he would work out a way to memorise them.
He said he wasn't sure he could work them out, so I asked him if he could work out 7x8.
Veyr quickly he supplied the answer, and I was mroe than a little amazed.
I asked him how he came to it.
"Oh- it was easy Mum- I just added 16 to 40."
"But why 40?", I asked, because I couldn't think what was obvious about that at all.
"Half of 80", he answered.
We dug a little deeper, and this is what I found.
When presented with the sum 7x8, my unschooled 10 year old multiplied 8x10, halved it, and added 16 which he knew was 2x8.
10 x 8 = 80
80/2 = 40
2x8= 16
5x8 + 2x8= 7x8
= 56
Then he floored me by saying he wasn't any good at maths, it isn't really his "thing".
I commented that most kids his age in school would know their timestables by now, but that it wasn't a worry for me because he was able to work them out, and if he ever decided they would be useful to know quickly- he would work out a way to memorise them.
He said he wasn't sure he could work them out, so I asked him if he could work out 7x8.
Veyr quickly he supplied the answer, and I was mroe than a little amazed.
I asked him how he came to it.
"Oh- it was easy Mum- I just added 16 to 40."
"But why 40?", I asked, because I couldn't think what was obvious about that at all.
"Half of 80", he answered.
We dug a little deeper, and this is what I found.
When presented with the sum 7x8, my unschooled 10 year old multiplied 8x10, halved it, and added 16 which he knew was 2x8.
10 x 8 = 80
80/2 = 40
2x8= 16
5x8 + 2x8= 7x8
= 56
Then he floored me by saying he wasn't any good at maths, it isn't really his "thing".
Peekaboo!
Hello...just popping in to say "hi" while we visit Auckladn fora few days.
Everything is goign well at the bach except
a) Tombliboo misses his Daddy teribly. He wakes eveyr morning crying, though this morning it was only a statement, "I want my Daddy", then on to the next thing...turning on the lights to see the rain- which brings me to the oter exception...
b) RAIN...oh my goodness, you wouldn't believe the rain! It is daily. I'm not joking. Every day it rains. Some days it rains fro the entire day. No, that's not quite true- it rains and rains and rains, and hten it clears, and you jump up to get your jacket (just in case it rains again) and head to the beach...but before your jacket is done up- it rains...again.
Right now, I find it comical, but I'm sure one day I will want to say words I don't usually say.
On Tuesday, I took masses of clean, but soaking washing (re-spun) to the laundromat to be dried. I bought a clothes horse to try not to have this problem again. We should be ok.
J-Man doesn't care that's raining- he wants to go to the beach regardless, in his jammies no less. I'm not so motivated, but trying hard.
We foudn a swimming pool that is veyr cheap (hooray), and had a blast there on Tuesday...but had to leave before anyone was ready to get the washing before the place clsoed. The only drawback is that under 3's must where a swimming nappy. I said my son wouldn;t liek that, and that he hadn;t worn nappies since he was 7 weeks old, but the rule remains.
We didn't get in the pool for quite some time...every time I got near Tmbliboo with the dreaded nappy, he hiffed it as far away as possible. Eventually (adn sadly) he saw that I was not going to let him in to the pool until he had it on. It still wasn't easy to put on him, but we did the deed, and he lit up like a christmas tree when we got in the water.
I let the kids choose something up to $10 from a shop that day as well...the only condition was that it wasn't food. J-Man chose books...yes that's right...my never-reading son, chose books! Not only that, he read them before we got home! Not only that- he had been humming and haa-ing over whether or not to buy the books or a stuffed panda, and told the sales lady he chose the books because they are more rewarding. She said it warmed her heart- it near stopped mine beating.
Today we visited a Playcntre, and they were very welcoming. We will go once a week, and Tombliboo will ahvea ball (though they did insist he put his clothes back on today when he stripped off). Princess will love it too, and didn't want to leave today. J-Man is veyr welcome, and he found plenty to do, but also felt awkward in parts, not really thining he belonged- especially when he needed to use to bathroom, and discovered toilets made for 2 year olds.
I think it will be a fun adventure. I hoep I can keep my giggles to myself when chidlren are asked to "put on school legs and arms". No, I don;t think I will be able to. I might just need to chat to the supervisors abotu that one...or not. I'll see. I'd like to think we can make a difference there, as well as just having a cool place to hang out and paint and play on a cool playground, etc.
Ben came to visit us last weekend, and the kids nearly toppled him when he waled through the door. I had a neat mother's day, with breakfast in bed love from Ben and Princess. I got gorgeous handmade cards, even one from my husband- turns out he misses me.
Ben took the kids to the beach while I had "a break", only I didn;t really knwo what to do with myself, so swept the bach, adn did the dsiehs and some dinner prep instead.
We went for a drive to a park, and for the kids to buy little treats. It was really nice. Ben is missing us all terribly. I forogt how terribly he does on his own.
I'm amazed I have not felt removed from real life at all...it's fun. I love being with my chidlren, don't miss adult contact at all- though I will enjoy it whenI get some :0)
I've done piles of puzzles, finished a book I started over a month ago, and begun another one I started last year, and never quite got in to. I don't know why I didn't- it's brilliant...Animal Vegetable, Miracle.
J-Man wants to go on here now, so I wil lsign off, and hopefully post again before we head abck to the bach.
We have no internet anywhere there, since the conecctions are so terrible, it takes 30 minutes to upload the mail, and look at the bank statement. So, we live without, and it isn't a problem.
One of my bach dreams was realised this morning when Tombliboo woke up and didn't cry for Daddy, merely said "I want my Dad", and got on wiht things...turning on the lgiht to look at the rain, and get a book.
Then J-Man came in to bed with us for snuggles and Hop on Pop. Princess would have joined us but (bossy) Tombliboo told her to sit in the lounge. The bed it a mite too small for 4 anyway, but 3of us snuggled in the bed, listening to the rain, and reading Dr Seuss. It was lovely.
J-Man has gone back to watching tv with his siblings, I can carry on...
We are eating dinner at 5m each day! I know...crazy! But we don't need to wait for Ben to get home, and so we are doing everything earlier. We are all in bed by 9:30pm most nights, some nights as early as 8:30pm.
The bach is very relaxing, even with a toddler.
We had a power cut one morning, which was disconcerting since the water is on a pump. I'm prepared for next time, sort of, but hope it isn't too regualr an occurrence.
The kids have made a "base" in the sand dunes, where they would like to hang out more if it weren't for the rain. J-Man has colour in his cheeks from all the running in the wind.
I've got a tonne of questions in my head about our lifestyle, and no good answers.
I notice that he needs a project of sorts to be happy- but it must be of his own devising. He is so happy at the moemnt. Just like when he dug the mudbath at home, or the big hole in the front yard. Some sort of purpose beyond the computer seems to inspire him, and the outdoors and the exercise is just what his body needs.
Only he doesn't see it...and nothing I think of grabs him. I'm not sure where my thoughts are heading on that count, but I like how things are now. I don't ever want to dictate to him when he can and cant go on the computer, for exapmple, but I know also how easy it is for him to get sucked in by it. How easy it is for anyone. I can't believe how many hours I spent in front of hte thing when I could.
He's written letters to his best friend, and drawn pictures for no other reason than that he wanted to. He's read 100 pages of Twilight, and invented games to play while we are stuck inside. He's happy, for the most part.
He has moany days too, which drive us all to distraction- but a quick reminder that this is how it is, and we didn't do it to torture him, and he's off finding things to do.
My time is really up now :0)
Everything is goign well at the bach except
a) Tombliboo misses his Daddy teribly. He wakes eveyr morning crying, though this morning it was only a statement, "I want my Daddy", then on to the next thing...turning on the lights to see the rain- which brings me to the oter exception...
b) RAIN...oh my goodness, you wouldn't believe the rain! It is daily. I'm not joking. Every day it rains. Some days it rains fro the entire day. No, that's not quite true- it rains and rains and rains, and hten it clears, and you jump up to get your jacket (just in case it rains again) and head to the beach...but before your jacket is done up- it rains...again.
Right now, I find it comical, but I'm sure one day I will want to say words I don't usually say.
On Tuesday, I took masses of clean, but soaking washing (re-spun) to the laundromat to be dried. I bought a clothes horse to try not to have this problem again. We should be ok.
J-Man doesn't care that's raining- he wants to go to the beach regardless, in his jammies no less. I'm not so motivated, but trying hard.
We foudn a swimming pool that is veyr cheap (hooray), and had a blast there on Tuesday...but had to leave before anyone was ready to get the washing before the place clsoed. The only drawback is that under 3's must where a swimming nappy. I said my son wouldn;t liek that, and that he hadn;t worn nappies since he was 7 weeks old, but the rule remains.
We didn't get in the pool for quite some time...every time I got near Tmbliboo with the dreaded nappy, he hiffed it as far away as possible. Eventually (adn sadly) he saw that I was not going to let him in to the pool until he had it on. It still wasn't easy to put on him, but we did the deed, and he lit up like a christmas tree when we got in the water.
I let the kids choose something up to $10 from a shop that day as well...the only condition was that it wasn't food. J-Man chose books...yes that's right...my never-reading son, chose books! Not only that, he read them before we got home! Not only that- he had been humming and haa-ing over whether or not to buy the books or a stuffed panda, and told the sales lady he chose the books because they are more rewarding. She said it warmed her heart- it near stopped mine beating.
Today we visited a Playcntre, and they were very welcoming. We will go once a week, and Tombliboo will ahvea ball (though they did insist he put his clothes back on today when he stripped off). Princess will love it too, and didn't want to leave today. J-Man is veyr welcome, and he found plenty to do, but also felt awkward in parts, not really thining he belonged- especially when he needed to use to bathroom, and discovered toilets made for 2 year olds.
I think it will be a fun adventure. I hoep I can keep my giggles to myself when chidlren are asked to "put on school legs and arms". No, I don;t think I will be able to. I might just need to chat to the supervisors abotu that one...or not. I'll see. I'd like to think we can make a difference there, as well as just having a cool place to hang out and paint and play on a cool playground, etc.
Ben came to visit us last weekend, and the kids nearly toppled him when he waled through the door. I had a neat mother's day, with breakfast in bed love from Ben and Princess. I got gorgeous handmade cards, even one from my husband- turns out he misses me.
Ben took the kids to the beach while I had "a break", only I didn;t really knwo what to do with myself, so swept the bach, adn did the dsiehs and some dinner prep instead.
We went for a drive to a park, and for the kids to buy little treats. It was really nice. Ben is missing us all terribly. I forogt how terribly he does on his own.
I'm amazed I have not felt removed from real life at all...it's fun. I love being with my chidlren, don't miss adult contact at all- though I will enjoy it whenI get some :0)
I've done piles of puzzles, finished a book I started over a month ago, and begun another one I started last year, and never quite got in to. I don't know why I didn't- it's brilliant...Animal Vegetable, Miracle.
J-Man wants to go on here now, so I wil lsign off, and hopefully post again before we head abck to the bach.
We have no internet anywhere there, since the conecctions are so terrible, it takes 30 minutes to upload the mail, and look at the bank statement. So, we live without, and it isn't a problem.
One of my bach dreams was realised this morning when Tombliboo woke up and didn't cry for Daddy, merely said "I want my Dad", and got on wiht things...turning on the lgiht to look at the rain, and get a book.
Then J-Man came in to bed with us for snuggles and Hop on Pop. Princess would have joined us but (bossy) Tombliboo told her to sit in the lounge. The bed it a mite too small for 4 anyway, but 3of us snuggled in the bed, listening to the rain, and reading Dr Seuss. It was lovely.
J-Man has gone back to watching tv with his siblings, I can carry on...
We are eating dinner at 5m each day! I know...crazy! But we don't need to wait for Ben to get home, and so we are doing everything earlier. We are all in bed by 9:30pm most nights, some nights as early as 8:30pm.
The bach is very relaxing, even with a toddler.
We had a power cut one morning, which was disconcerting since the water is on a pump. I'm prepared for next time, sort of, but hope it isn't too regualr an occurrence.
The kids have made a "base" in the sand dunes, where they would like to hang out more if it weren't for the rain. J-Man has colour in his cheeks from all the running in the wind.
I've got a tonne of questions in my head about our lifestyle, and no good answers.
I notice that he needs a project of sorts to be happy- but it must be of his own devising. He is so happy at the moemnt. Just like when he dug the mudbath at home, or the big hole in the front yard. Some sort of purpose beyond the computer seems to inspire him, and the outdoors and the exercise is just what his body needs.
Only he doesn't see it...and nothing I think of grabs him. I'm not sure where my thoughts are heading on that count, but I like how things are now. I don't ever want to dictate to him when he can and cant go on the computer, for exapmple, but I know also how easy it is for him to get sucked in by it. How easy it is for anyone. I can't believe how many hours I spent in front of hte thing when I could.
He's written letters to his best friend, and drawn pictures for no other reason than that he wanted to. He's read 100 pages of Twilight, and invented games to play while we are stuck inside. He's happy, for the most part.
He has moany days too, which drive us all to distraction- but a quick reminder that this is how it is, and we didn't do it to torture him, and he's off finding things to do.
My time is really up now :0)
Friday, May 1, 2009
My Last Hurrah...
For a while :0)
Ben is about to pack up the computers ready for the big move tomorrow morning.
There still seems plenty to do before then...and after then with all the cleaning...but I (we) have done masses.
I wish this could be a loverly long post about all the cool things we've been up to...actually not that many cool things, but we have spent some time with friends, and lots have been happening while the kiddos grow and learn at home.
I can't even add photos for some bizarre reason. I have a neat one of Tombliboo stacking cans of drink...I know, what happened to minimising sugar?
Well, when I have a big job (and what could be bigger than moving out our lives from the last 3 years?) I need Coke. I don't apologise for it, or even wish it wasn't so- it just is, and that's life. I need chocolate too. It would be nice to sit down for a meal some time soon.
So Tombliboo got busy stacking them- he managed to build a tower of 8 coke cans before I got the camera. It was quite impressive. I really didn't think he would get past 5. Then he stacked them according to colour (Sprite and Coke), and then alternating colours. The side-by-side towers...then a big long row. He had so much fun with those cans, it was crazy!
I've got a really cute one of Princess, who has lost both her top front teeth...she looks adorable, and hilarious all at the same time. I've got several of her with some items she won in a mega prize pack on Sticky TV.
It was super mega...she got a Dora packpack, towel, duvet set and dvd, a Diego backpack, towel, duvet set and dvd, Twister, Guess Who, an mp3 player (which is her current fave), pink Lego, a Narnia book, a Charlie and Lola activity book, some Slime, some more slime that glows, a Wall-E soft toy, a BalaNZe Board (which is super-cool btw), and an Avalanche snow-maker.
There's a fair bit of it that isn;t interestign to her, which we will eb able to sell when we get settled, and get her somethign she does want. But it was a massive buzz!
J-Man has been busy making a video clip for his best friend. It makes me cry. I'm not much or a cry-er, but I blubber like a baby when I see how much he adores J12.
So, it's all go. Ben will be at het truck place at 9am, back here as quickly as possible. Grandma and Poppy will eb here too with a van, and maybe a trailer...and then we will load everything up. I've got a box or two to pack tonight before I sleep, but mostly it's all done. Phew!
I more or less emptied the garage today- was very ruthless. Put it all out the front, and before I had even done so there were people to take it all away.
We only have one shelf left inside, and possible a couch...some shelving in the garage which we'll offer to the neighbour's if N doesn't want them...and that's about it.
Oh, there are plenty of dirty tools and so on outside, which will need to be arranged on to the truck somehow. But mostly, it's all under control.
Once the truck is gone, I will clean for a bit, but I think I'll need to take off right away to take the kiddos to a show we have tickets for. It will be a nice break from the monotony of constantly cleaning/packing/tidying/throwing away.
I think I might go to sleep actually.
The truck needs to be back in Auckland by 10:30am Sunday, so Ben will decide if he wants to do a round-trip in a day, or leave early Sunday morning. There'll be a bed for him in Keirkeri (unlike here, lol).
Actually, we have had offers of beds, but I think a night on the floor might be fun.
Then, Sunday morning will be devoted to cleaning as much as possible in as short a time as possible, so we can possibly enjoy some time together before we split.
Ben will be staying with Nana, and the kiddos and I will be heading for the bach.
It's as neat place, right on the beach...it's kinda basic, and yet not at all! There's a toilet now!
Mostly, by "basic" I think I mean there's no phone. Cellphone coverage is pretty dicey. We get texts though, so it isn't as bad as it once was (you used to have to drive for a few minutes to stand at some rocks and dial out).
The kids can't wait...they are sooo excited! Not Tombliboo, I don't think he knows what is going on- he keeps telling me about what is missing and saying, "I want to go home", when we're already here.
I'm looking forward to really being with them. J-Man asked where Twilight is. He read 60 pages on the first day we got it but none since. We will eb rading a lto more books, andthat is ezxciting. I shoudl ahve organised hwo we get library access today, but I didn;t...we'll ahveto wing it.
Or get books out hedre and drive a bit further to return them (an hour). Not sure yet...but I am lookign forward to lots of snuggly book-reading.
I have a picture in my head not really based in reality, of us all snuggling up lsitneing to a wodnerful story (read by me wihtotu lsoign my voice, or fallign asleep).
Normalyl Tombliboo steals the book adn hides it, adn the same with it'sreplacement...maybe it will be differnt in a different place.
I'm also imagining that maybe the kids will pile in to my bed (those that aren't already in there, lol) for stories in the morning ,since I won;t be up checking my e-mails (because I can't).
I hope some of that comes true.
I hope I can learn to be a "lazy", not completely, just enough to relax...really relax.
As I type, Tombliboo has gone to sleep early (9pm), and J-Man and Princess are having fits of giggles playing a bizarre chasing game which has something to do with the green slime from her prize pack. Ben is packing up the her computer, and I need to get pack to all my millions of jobs.
Hopefully this lets everyone know what we will be up to.
I hope to add snippets whenever I am able...which really might not be very often...so it's adieu from me for a little while.
You'll be hearing a lot from me when we are settled in our new house, in a new town.
If anyone would like to visit, please do :0)
Ben is about to pack up the computers ready for the big move tomorrow morning.
There still seems plenty to do before then...and after then with all the cleaning...but I (we) have done masses.
I wish this could be a loverly long post about all the cool things we've been up to...actually not that many cool things, but we have spent some time with friends, and lots have been happening while the kiddos grow and learn at home.
I can't even add photos for some bizarre reason. I have a neat one of Tombliboo stacking cans of drink...I know, what happened to minimising sugar?
Well, when I have a big job (and what could be bigger than moving out our lives from the last 3 years?) I need Coke. I don't apologise for it, or even wish it wasn't so- it just is, and that's life. I need chocolate too. It would be nice to sit down for a meal some time soon.
So Tombliboo got busy stacking them- he managed to build a tower of 8 coke cans before I got the camera. It was quite impressive. I really didn't think he would get past 5. Then he stacked them according to colour (Sprite and Coke), and then alternating colours. The side-by-side towers...then a big long row. He had so much fun with those cans, it was crazy!
I've got a really cute one of Princess, who has lost both her top front teeth...she looks adorable, and hilarious all at the same time. I've got several of her with some items she won in a mega prize pack on Sticky TV.
It was super mega...she got a Dora packpack, towel, duvet set and dvd, a Diego backpack, towel, duvet set and dvd, Twister, Guess Who, an mp3 player (which is her current fave), pink Lego, a Narnia book, a Charlie and Lola activity book, some Slime, some more slime that glows, a Wall-E soft toy, a BalaNZe Board (which is super-cool btw), and an Avalanche snow-maker.
There's a fair bit of it that isn;t interestign to her, which we will eb able to sell when we get settled, and get her somethign she does want. But it was a massive buzz!
J-Man has been busy making a video clip for his best friend. It makes me cry. I'm not much or a cry-er, but I blubber like a baby when I see how much he adores J12.
So, it's all go. Ben will be at het truck place at 9am, back here as quickly as possible. Grandma and Poppy will eb here too with a van, and maybe a trailer...and then we will load everything up. I've got a box or two to pack tonight before I sleep, but mostly it's all done. Phew!
I more or less emptied the garage today- was very ruthless. Put it all out the front, and before I had even done so there were people to take it all away.
We only have one shelf left inside, and possible a couch...some shelving in the garage which we'll offer to the neighbour's if N doesn't want them...and that's about it.
Oh, there are plenty of dirty tools and so on outside, which will need to be arranged on to the truck somehow. But mostly, it's all under control.
Once the truck is gone, I will clean for a bit, but I think I'll need to take off right away to take the kiddos to a show we have tickets for. It will be a nice break from the monotony of constantly cleaning/packing/tidying/throwing away.
I think I might go to sleep actually.
The truck needs to be back in Auckland by 10:30am Sunday, so Ben will decide if he wants to do a round-trip in a day, or leave early Sunday morning. There'll be a bed for him in Keirkeri (unlike here, lol).
Actually, we have had offers of beds, but I think a night on the floor might be fun.
Then, Sunday morning will be devoted to cleaning as much as possible in as short a time as possible, so we can possibly enjoy some time together before we split.
Ben will be staying with Nana, and the kiddos and I will be heading for the bach.
It's as neat place, right on the beach...it's kinda basic, and yet not at all! There's a toilet now!
Mostly, by "basic" I think I mean there's no phone. Cellphone coverage is pretty dicey. We get texts though, so it isn't as bad as it once was (you used to have to drive for a few minutes to stand at some rocks and dial out).
The kids can't wait...they are sooo excited! Not Tombliboo, I don't think he knows what is going on- he keeps telling me about what is missing and saying, "I want to go home", when we're already here.
I'm looking forward to really being with them. J-Man asked where Twilight is. He read 60 pages on the first day we got it but none since. We will eb rading a lto more books, andthat is ezxciting. I shoudl ahve organised hwo we get library access today, but I didn;t...we'll ahveto wing it.
Or get books out hedre and drive a bit further to return them (an hour). Not sure yet...but I am lookign forward to lots of snuggly book-reading.
I have a picture in my head not really based in reality, of us all snuggling up lsitneing to a wodnerful story (read by me wihtotu lsoign my voice, or fallign asleep).
Normalyl Tombliboo steals the book adn hides it, adn the same with it'sreplacement...maybe it will be differnt in a different place.
I'm also imagining that maybe the kids will pile in to my bed (those that aren't already in there, lol) for stories in the morning ,since I won;t be up checking my e-mails (because I can't).
I hope some of that comes true.
I hope I can learn to be a "lazy", not completely, just enough to relax...really relax.
As I type, Tombliboo has gone to sleep early (9pm), and J-Man and Princess are having fits of giggles playing a bizarre chasing game which has something to do with the green slime from her prize pack. Ben is packing up the her computer, and I need to get pack to all my millions of jobs.
Hopefully this lets everyone know what we will be up to.
I hope to add snippets whenever I am able...which really might not be very often...so it's adieu from me for a little while.
You'll be hearing a lot from me when we are settled in our new house, in a new town.
If anyone would like to visit, please do :0)
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